Subdued

As you have observed, I will try to update my blog once a week now since on weekdays, I will be too tired to do anything with the computer upon reaching home after work.

Will be going for staff retreat next mon and tues. Hope it will be an enjoyable getaway experience with other colleagues in the office. I guess life will be more eventful in the future with more upcoming ad-hoc duties and events that will be scheduled along the way.

Everywhere I go now, be it in camp or workplace, I am always the youngest and therefore feeling very inexperienced and small in the presence of others. I shall remember how I feel now and note the changes along the way as time goes. Cos I wonder when I can reach the stage when I no longer will feel this way but instead, feel empowered and being capable to guide and lead others. Now in every setting, I am always the one listening and following ppl which actually I dont enjoy very much. Sometimes I wonder is it bcos I am not given opportunities to prove what I may be able to do OR should I just be relieved that I am better off not given the oppt cos at the end of the day, I might just realized I do not have the ability to do so? haiz...

Recently received new case files of my own but have not really started anything with my clients yet cos still waiting for them to call me to book appointment for office interviews after sending out letters. So you can imagine me staring at the phone for it to ring these days. haa. Cant wait to have a hands-on experience with my own clients to have the real taste of what my work will be like man.

Dint get to meet and catch up with some of you since the last time we met. Hope you guys are fine? Exams are coming soon i guess, work hard ok and hope to meet up one day to chill out or something. All the best for now. Keep in touch.

Work and stuff...

This week went to a client's house with colleague. The guy suffer from some skin problem, the skin peel all over his house, got open wounds on his skin too. Then his house got some smell due to poor hygiene. I felt uncomfortable uppn entering his house bcos of the sight of his skin problem, hygiene status of his home and the most unavoidable stench lingering in the house. He has IMH record of social withdrawal and poverty of speech which makes me want to be aware that I cannot harbour any feeling of discrimination and disgust towards him. But I find him quite cute in the end after some conversation with him...but still find him very ke lian given his skin condition.

Don't know what kind of cases will be passed to me to handle man. Scared they see I major in Psychology then will pass me all the psychiatric clients cos I think that is what happened to my colleague. Oh manz. Such clients very hard to handle bcos the information they give might be inaccurate and therefore make it very hard for us to assess their situation. Best is to handle straightfoward case when client is single, poor and old. Worst is to get complicated family case where got alot of things to clarify and deal with.

By the way, my job title is senior community development officer if you guys not yet know what I am doing. Basically, we assess clients' eligibility in meeting up the criteria we have for our social assistance schemes. Though we have some guidelines to fall back on, alot of times the conclusion of a case depends on the officer who is handling it. Some colleagues very strict, very fast close case if never receive the documents needed.... then their performance rating will be quite good lor as they able to finish closing their cases within the stipulated time frame. Quantity seems more impt than quality in this job it seems, from what I see.

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Its a pity that only now den he showed interest in getting back with me. I waited during the first few weeks for that to happen but it never came. Since then, I have moved on and gotten myself readjusted to a carefree life on my own already. Days when I no longer have to prioritize my free days to him anymore, no obligations to follow and no need the extra effort made to consider about another person's thoughts and feelings like before...


If only we have been motivated enough to improve things there and then and avoided the breakup altogether, it would have been better than now to be picking up the bits and pieces all over again... which I am not ready for.

Honeymoon period

Yar the first 2 weeks at work for me is no serious work yet. As much as I am looking forward to handling the cases on my own very soon, I can't imagine how I will be coping then, given the loads of information and knowledge that I need to absorb during the meanwhile. Really alot man. So challenging. So frens, u all studying, I also like studying rite now. Sama sama! Same boat!

Have been tagging along with colleague to go for home visits to see how interviews are done. A really close-up interaction with members at the lower strata of the society. Elderly ppl are really sad case. Hard to get money from children, on the other hand hard to get money from the us (govt) cos we have strict criteria to meet up in order for us to give social assistance. We promote self-reliance and believe that the first level of support is the family and not the govt. Our clients tend to see us as the 'saviours' who can bring them out of their poverty cycle but in actual fact, we have little power in granting them social assistance as supervisor need to approve our recommendations in the end. Not up to us to decide. We are the 'investigators' who explores and dig out information that are needed for us to assess their eligibility for our social assistance schemes. We also act like social workers who need to be involed in other miscellaneous stuff related to our clients as well.

Can forsee my future days to be real busy from what I see from my colleagues. They stayed back, even coming on saturdays to write reports and stuff. Not enough staff to handle the number of cases we are receiving every now and then. They seem overloaded with so many cases and follow-ups to do. I hope my entry can help to unload some of their burdens man. But right now I still feel un-equipped....yet they still keep telling me to enjoy my honeymoon first. I wanna learn as much as I can now so that when real work starts, I can get into the right gear straight away la.

My mum says poor ppl have endless stories to tell as poverty branches out from all kinds of unique circumstances. As for the rich ppl, they only have one happy story to tell.

All-in-1 except 1

Our most impt leader in the camp wasnt in the pic. He took these individual pics, made this wallpaper yet dint include himself. haiyo...


(phil, can guess which one is the nu qiang ren that I told u abt?)

Back from NACLI.

Tomorrow will be the start of my work. Excited and nervous at the same time, which is what many of my campmates are feeling too.

Met quite nice ppl from the camp esp my 2 room mates. Every nite back to our room after our respective group project discussion, we will share our woes, complaints and stuff. The last nite in the chalet, we gossip like hell till 5 am after returning from a late ktv outing at marina square. haha...

The camp is pretty much like a student's camp we had back in school days. Got games to play, outdoor cooking, lectures etc. Even got scandals here and there! In a year's time, I will get to attend a 3 days 2 nites OBS camp! can U believe it? haha....OBS is under PA as well, so its part of an enrichment program for all PA staff. Good for me as I am one who will never get selected to go for such camp in my school days. So getting the chance to attend such challenging camp is a privilege for me! Quite excited abt it.


A new beginning shall start from this moment. Finally.